Knight Markris of Nerp

Knight Markris of Nerp

A tall tale by Tiko


There was a wild boar on the loose, a long time ago, that people called Ravager. It was almost twice as tall as your father, Piki, and it was as angry as they come. People think that it came from Durgrimmor, and that the Vashra down there made it to plague us. It killed several people and was destroying crops left and right. Entire villages packed up and left if they heard that he was coming to them. I was a child when it was running loose, in a village called Nerp. It's a lot like this one.

The king's knights went out to meet it. There were many great men there, there was Sendow, a tall knight with formidable sword play and Braed, a knight with formidable archery skills. There was also Hewed, the king's son, and Paldok, his foremost general.
The captain of the guard also went out with his choicest men, and the three brothers Baye, men who were unrivalled in the use of spears and lances. Ravager, however proved to be too much for them. Sendow couldn't get close enough to attack without being killed by the boar's horns. Braed's arrows couldn't damage his thick hide, and the boar moved too quickly for him to shoot Ravager in the eyes. Hewed was almost killed under the boar's tremendous hooves, but was saved by Paldok, the general who was killed instead. The royal guard could barely keep out of the boar's way, and the brothers Baye could barely scratch his hide with their spears. Sood the party retreated, and reported their failure to the king.

At that time, in Nerp, we had a blacksmith known as Markris, and he was a giant of a man. His fist was as big as a normal man's head, and he could swing a hammer that few other men could lift. When he heard that the king's men had abandoned the thought of killing the boar, he began to plan his own attack.

In a couple days, the village heard that ravager was coming. Most people began to pack their most precious things, but not Markris. He took a bar three times as long as a man's step, and sharpened on the end and a large, fragrant, stewed carrot, and set out in the direction of Ravager.

Nerp was on a hill, so we could see what was happening. Markris stepped out into the fallows just as Ravager rose up over a distant hill. We saw Ravager descend on Markris, but before he arrived, he smelled the carrot. Markris had stuck it onto the end of his pole and was holding it up in front of Ravager. Ravager sniffed the carrot, then went to lick it, but Markris moved it away. Ravager trotted after the carrot like a puppy trots to his supper, only a lot larger and more deadly. Ravager reached out for the carrot. Markris moved it away again. Ravager reached for the carrot once more, and Markris shook it off onto the ground. the boar lowered its massive head to eat, and Markris thrusted the pole through the thick part of it's neck.The boar roared, and spun to face Markris, but Markris had anticipated this and held on tight to the pole. He swung through the air, but kept his grip. Ravager swung his tusks toward Markris agian, but Markris still held on tight. Markris leapt on to the pole, and from there onto the baor's neck. He pulled a stake and a hammer from his jerkin, and prepared to drive the stake into the boar's skull, but the boar shook him and he dropped them. Markris wasn't finished yet, though. He squeezed the boar's chest between his legs until it's ribs cracked. He then siezed the boar by it's eyebrow ridged, jerked it's head backwards, and broke it's neck.

After all this, Markris was knighted and was invited to live in a castle. He accepted, but when he was no longer being nobility, he would be a blacksmith.